The Butt Blog

 

 

Posting in the summer sun has been a bit of a challenge, both for my busy fingers, and fantabulious(?) frizzled hair. ( Only two weeks in…I think I need an assistant mama! ) I’m ready for fall/fall into bed/to fall off the responsible parent band wagon and begin bribing with candies! Yup, I so do that in the summer. Anything blue raspberry flavored is a big hit, or treats containing bugs. Gross yet effective.

Birdie is part of an invitation only math ‘prodigy’ class for the next month. As proud as I am and believe me I AM SO PROUD – I’m sad I can’t converse with her about all she’s learning. I.suck.at.math.

Summer is our season of random facts, in which I will happily share with you, my amazing minions, as I learn them.

Courtesy of Birdie
Turtles breathe out their butts.
I googled it.
The Australian White-throated Snapping Turtle does it to be specific. Because we wouldn’t want to make this claim about every turtle. It’s a rare thing indeed to breathe out ones butt. Let’s not get into the finer points of this fact but enjoy that my daughter found it at all. And I’m still laughing about it.

My son JJ likes to regurgitate the inappropriate comments (because he’s six yuh know) that our neighbors make. I’ve been getting schooled on the word ‘juicy‘ and how said word is used by a certain Mister neighbor to describe the Missus’ butt. JJ told me my butt was juicy this morning and I spray n’ washed his cute little face with my coffee.

*Have your kids or other small humans in your lives said anything you just can’t forget? Funny factoids? I’d love to read all about it!*


 

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Bits Gets Fancy!

I have arrived…as in I have an official email address for my blog! Isn’t that exciting. Like, oh my gosh I’m so committed. Feel free to ask anything of me or even shoot me some ideas for future posts! To celebrate I’m giving you all the gift of laughter. Be warned there might be cursing, or just nonsensical silly time…

 

WTAF fishing 101

 

Fainting goats? Oh yesss please!

 

Bacon. Need I say more?

 

Okay I’m done being obnoxious. I hope at least one video made you laugh. I almost forgot…here’s my new email address. If ever you need a ‘friend’ I’m here.

bitslittleblog@gmail.com

*You would be quite surprised how hard it was to come up with an email that didn’t sound like the name of a pornstar or pornographic movie title. I may not be the sharpest tool in the shed but I know what ‘heavenlylittlebits’ @ hotmail.com sounds like.*